Coping with Panic Attacks, PTSD, and Meltdowns
The very first thing you need to know, is that you are not alone. Hundreds of us are struggling with our mental health. There is no shame in this, it just means you are human. You should feel proud for seeking help and resources.
If even reading a list feels overwhelming, please find a shortened version here!
I have struggled with CPTSD and anxiety or a number of years, but so often mental illness is not given the same weight that more ‘physical’ conditions are. I am still learning to unlearn the coping mechanisms that I have developed, such as intense self criticism when my mental illnesses flare up. I don’t want to get into the gory details, but I do want to share some resources that I have found useful for anxiety, panic attacks, thought sprials, flashbacks, etc! So, here goes!
A Guide to Neurodivergent Meltdowns - Anyone can have a meltdown. This guide is also helpful for overwhelm, panic attacks and other mental illnesses/neurodiverse conditions, not just ADHD and Autism! This website has lots of other fantastic resources too, so I hope it is of use to you.
Talking to a trusted person - The number one thing that helps me is talking things through, whether to my brother, my mum, my sister-in-love(s), a friend, or Tonks, my dog! I realise that not everyone has a loving and trustworthy support network, but one of the best things you can do is grow one, and make sure you reach out to them when you need to. There are plenty of online communities that offer support (you can join our very own Communi-tea here!) Even if you feel completely isolated and like there is nobody you can talk to, I promise that you are not alone, and that people care about you. I am one of them! Email me at teawithhb@gmail.com if you need free access to our communi-tea discord.
Shakti Mat, Pillow, Weighted Wrap, and Headband - As with many neurodivergent people, reducing or increasing stimulation can help manage meltdowns, and this mat is not only great for chronic/back pain but also helps my mental health! The weighted wrap has a similar effect, but is also able to be heated! Shakti were kind enough to gift me their wrap and headband after I reached out to them in praise of their mat and pillow, and I am delighted to say every single product I have tried has significantly improved my life! So much so that I am now a Shakti Affiliate, meaning you’ll get 10% off their products with the code BLOSSOM10 and I’ll earn 10% for commission! You can slide the weighted wrap in to the mat, roll it up to help shape the spikes, or use the heat for cramps, digestion issues, or pain outside of the mat. I use mine every day! The headband is helpful for those who experience migraine or headaches, and is also a great, safe way to experience the stimulating relief that those who self-harm might need. I cannot recommend this company highly enough and am so grateful they exist.
Kuddly Weighted Blanket - After asking our communi-tea what helps them with anxiety, many of you recommended weighted blankets- specifically the brand Kuddly! I reached out to them, and they were kind enough to not only gift me a weighted blanket but also create a discount code especially for you! Use BLOSSOM15 for 15% off both their Weighted Blankets variants (4.7 & 7kg). I have found their 7kg weighted blanket very comforting for its swaddling effect, it is incredibly soft and the weight is evenly distributed. Please note that if you have chronic pain, a connective tissue disorder, or a joint condition, you might need help carrying it and moving it! I have mine on my bed so I can move it around easily when I need it, rather than storing it elsewhere. Check out this video on the science behind weighted blankets!
Practicing Self Compassion - Now look, we have all heard the old ‘if you wouldn't say that to a friend then don't say it to yourself‘ when being self critical. Unfortunately, this advice is very hard to apply in the moment (I mean of course we would never say that to a friend!) Sometimes, I have found it easier to imagine a younger version of myself, because it helps me reframe the situation in a way that imagining a friend doesn't. This particular technique might not work for you, but I hope that this website has some resources that will!
Boundaries - Whether it is setting a bedtime for yourself, spending less time with someone who makes you feel like crap, pacing yourself, leaving situations that make you uncomfortable, or anything else! Our environments, relationships, and attitude all impact our mental health. Also, BONUS, enforcing healthy boundaries enables other people to feel comfortable creating boundaries with you! Win-win :)
Sleep Hypnosis - I also struggle with anxiety and racing thoughts that can contribute to my other conditions, and whilst meditation has never really worked for me, I do find binaural beats and sleep hypnosis to be helpful sometimes!
Reducing PTSD Nightmares - If you too struggle with nightmares that interfere with your day, you might like this resource! It is not a fail safe, but has definitely helped lots of people including me!
EMDR Therapy - Please know that if CBT or other talking therapies have not worked for you, maybe Somatic Therapy, EMDR, or another kind of therapy will! There are many kinds of therapy and not all are available easily on the NHS. I have found Maisie’s resources and website incredibly helpful (That’s how I found the PTSD nightmares video!) and love that her personal experiences have informed and enriched her professional work. You can find free resources on her website if you are interested in learning more.
Breathing Exercises - Butterfly Breathing, Bee Breathing, Box Breathing, Alternate Nostril Breathing, I never knew how many things you can help with just breath!!! I have even dedicated an entire podcast episode to breathing here!
Create a Happy Place - This could be a board on Pinterest, a saved album on social media, or an album on your phone of things that make you SMILE! Photos of loved ones, memes that make you chuckle, screenshots of kind texts from friends, cute baby animals, the possibilities are endless!!
How to Keep House While Drowning by KC Davies - A compassionate guide to keeping your home functional and finding kindness towards yourself while accomplishing household tasks.
Distract your brain! - Sour candy, cold water, ice cube or ice pack on the neck, cold showers, shakti mat, anything that can cut through and help reset your nervous system and stimulate your vagus nerve can sometimes help!
Dopamine Menu - You don’t need to be diagnosed with or identify as being neurodivergent in order for this technique to help you! I find it useful for tuning in with my body as someone with Dyspraxia and Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (which affects the WHOLE body including bladder, gut, etc!) because my body doesn’t get the same strength of signal for things like hunger, needing the loo, drinking water etc, as some other bodies! So it is a great tool to remind me to check in with my body! How To Create A Dopamine Menu?
Starters: Short boosts like stretching, dancing, breathing exercises, snacking, looking at your Happy Place Album, or hugging a loved one/pet!
Mains: Things that might take a little more time like journaling, going for a walk, making or eating a comfort meal.
Sides: Activities you can do to make tasks more fun such as listening to music, podcasts, audiobooks, or calling a friend!
Desserts: There’s no such thing as a guilty pleasure! But things like scrolling social media, retail therapy, comfort eating, procrastinating, and other totally natural coping mechanisms can sometimes lead to guilt. Doing these things with intention and/or a time limit, rather than beating yourself up over doing them as a default, can help you feel better about them!
Specials: Rare treats that you might have to build up to/save up for! Examples include going on holiday, concerts, having a fancy dinner or a takeaway!
Please note that your menu might look different and these are just for inspiration! Sometimes getting outside or having a shower is a Special, and brushing your teeth might be a main! We all have different needs and energy levels, so please don’t compare! Let me know if you’d like help creating a low-spoon/chronic illness friendly Dopamine Menu!
Please don’t feel disappointed if something on this list doesn’t work for you, you might try it again on another day when it does! Hopefully there is at least one thing that might be a little helpful. Please share this with a friend or on your socials to normalise talking about mental health, you never know who might need help!